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Travelogue: Keystone Conference 2023 – Day Three

My amazing experience continues...

March 24, 2023, my Day Three at Keystone.

See that picture above, that is proof positive that I had a few too many, I talk too much and I was not thinking. That was the only photo I have of me in that dress. I take a million pictures of me going grocery shopping, but dressed for dinner, I take one picture.

I picked up these wonderfully candid photos from Facebook.

On this day, I basically just hung out with friends. I did a photo shoot for Cristy Garcia and kept up my talking with anyone and everyone who would listen.

That evening, hence the LBD, we had our Vanity Club dinner. I always enjoy seeing everyone and getting caught up.

Now if you happen to like this dress (I LOVE IT!), check it out here. Now I have to break the one and done rule just to get a few more photos!

On consecutive days, ironically during Keystone week, I received message from two different people I did not know prior. One I was able to meet at Keystone. The other, Crystal, is now one of our Contributors! This is how that started…

Hello, Kandi!

Hooray! Hallelujah! Thank God!

I just found your website, Kandi’s Land.

It felt like I had just discovered a new planet and one that is well within reach.

While I haven’t had time yet to ingest and digest all of the wonderful sections of your website, you speak directly to me and where (or wear – if we are talking about dressing) I am at this moment.

Short version: At almost 74 several “fortunate encounters” cleared my eyes about my years of crossdressing and landed right about where you are. In fact, I landed on your page for a reason.

Sparing you the long story, which even at your younger age, you have already lived through, I will visit your site as I progress. I am seeing a gender therapist for the first time this Friday. The goal is to do what you did in terms of sharing the joy and benefits of being Crystal with my Wife of 50+ years. I am praying daily, almost hourly, that her response will be as positive and supportive as you received from your wife.

The work I am about now, beyond perfecting myself as Crystal, is to frame my story and joy to help my wife embrace “both” of me. She knows I am a Gemini, and knew I crossdressed in the 80’s so I am somewhat confident she will support me. She is very supportive of the trans community at large, so why not at home.

I see two major obstacles: why did I keep it a secret from her for so long and how much money have I spent on this? 

Are there more? Thanks for being out there in Kandi’s Land for me and so many others!


Crystal Joens

I then thanked her and stated the obvious, she is beautiful and then received the following:


Thank you so much for the kind compliment and loving encouragement. You are as wonderful as I have heard. 

Good insight about each relationship being unique. And yet, there are always shared experiences to learn from. Shame is one and that is legitimate, so thanks for pulling that forward for me..

It was through a series of recent experiences, that my heart as Crystal DID indeed open up. And my wife has noticed the very positive difference. I am usually a “good” person and have become even more cheerful and helpful and fun. I am dressing in brighter colors. I have dropped 25 pounds. She has asked, what’s motivating you. I told her I was working on it. 

We have both been outspokenly supportive of our children’s many LDBTQ friends. I have scheduled 4 sessions with a gender therapist that I have researched and trust.

I have high hopes and often tell the people I “coach” that if they frame the conversation as “positive” rather than “difficult” it will go much better. And it usually does. 

Thanks for your encouragement.

As for “sharing” my letter and story, absolutely. While I keep my male identity confidential, I am all over Flickr with photos as Crystal Joens. In fact, as a fairly good writer, I would be happy to share more of my thoughts and experiences for you and your site. I am eager to read all of it as soon as I can.

I truly appreciate you being there for me and us.




Quite remarkable and now you all get the opportunity to meet her as well!

When we finalize our Keystone adventures, more photos than you can imagine!


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