Let’s get out the rather large mailbag here at the Kandi’s Land World headquarters….
Okay, after having sorted through hundreds, well…tens of….okay this one email I got…
“You have no idea!!!” Those were her words. Why this remark hit me so hard was because I have more than an idea, I have experience!!!.
The above remark came from the lips of a woman who I believed to be someone who understood the path I have walked throughout my life and one who was close enough related to have knowledge of that.
What was that of which I had no idea, was it being a woman or of not understanding something trivial? Her comment was that I had no idea of what it was to be a mother, sister or aunt!! So began a very heated debate between her and I that hopefully enlightened her.
As for being a mother, yes she was correct as of course I have never given birth, but then again I have spiritually and financially raised two daughters to be good mothers themselves after their mother passed away when they were very young. I cared for them, wiped their tears and listened to their problems, financially I saw both through university and sat as proud as any mother there when each graduated. Yes I think I can stand to say that I have an idea of being a mother.
As for being a sister, well who was it that fought like a tigress when my sister needed medical assistance, cared for my nieces when my sister was hospitalised for a fortnight, doing the school runs, cooking and cleaning and so forth, which brings me to being an auntie, a role I embraced fully without a second thought.
From all this I have now got two daughters who are themselves mothers and wives, a sister who sees me now as a sister and nieces that share their most private feelings with their auntie Faye.
So as I told this woman, my late wife’s sister, I do have an idea of what it is two be a mother, sister and aunt, more so I have gained the knowledge of what it is to be a woman in the home and workplace.
If she accepted all of this I cannot say, but her concluding remark was “Well Faye, that was refreshingly woman to woman, so let’s just agree to disagree on a few points!!!”
Well Kandi, I suppose you cannot win them all.
My work at the care home is so rewarding and the minor ‘bumps’ (as above) on an otherwise smooth road I can handle.
I hope my ramblings haven’t intruded too much into your day, but who better to share one’s feelings with than a sister who listens and cares !!
Best wishesFaye x
Intrude on my day…..how about made my day!
Friendships with women like yourself just fill me with pride!
We all have our own set of beliefs, views, personal experiences, prejudices, etc., but that fact that she could agree to disagree is all we can ask of anyone. If more people agreed to disagree, maybe our society as a whole could move forward.
Love you, my sister!Kandi
Now allow me to make a few additional points.
Faye, you are such a shining light! I am so pleased to be your sister. While we could never meet, we are connected by a mutual love. Thank you for simply being a tremendous human being.
Let’s think about what she said. Every one of our beloved readers has their own unique set of circumstances, their own unique beliefs and experiences, their own unique need to express whatever they define as femininity. No two of us are alike, but all of us are sisters. Look at your siblings, if you have them. You all have the same parents, came up under the same general circumstances, yet you are very different in many ways and the same in many other ways. Certainly shared experiences play a factor in that.
My point, understand you, be you, get a handle on what you are and then let the world see what a beautiful flower that you are.
Never stop being you, always seek happiness. If you are not happy, those around you will probably not be happy and what kind of life is that?
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Another recent correspondence that came into the old mailbag:
Hi Kandi,You Know Who You Are!
I have been following your blog for quite some time, and I cannot tell you how much it has meant to me. It’s a breath of fresh air every day. I’ve been to Keystone before (five years ago) but haven’t been back since. Hopefully I’ll have a chance to meet you in person one day and just give you a hug. Please keep doing what you’re doing.
I get these every once in a while, often from someone I did not know prior and they always fill me with both joy and pride! Without sounding more self-centered than you probably already think I am, where this has gone and where we still have to go is amazing! It’s like a house painter being thrown a canvas and some oil paints and creating a masterpiece! You all are part of our masterpiece!