By Jocelyn Johnson
The last item we put on before we head out the door is a pair of shoes. The shoes must match our outfit and be appropriate for the activity of our outing. Most women have an extensive collection of shoes; colours and styles for all occasions.
I have large feet, size 12 and EEE. And the toes on my right foot angle to the side, so my right foot is wider than my left. Finding any shoes that are comfortable is near impossible.
I think all of us CD/TG ladies want to wear 4” stilettos. My second pair of shoes were black 3” stilettos, which I love, but can’t wear for more than a few minutes; ouch. My first pair of shoes were ballerina flats. Unfortunately they were size 13 and I could not walk in them too far without them falling off. Even Kleenex in the toes didn’t help.
My third shoes were 3” block heel Mary Jane’s, which I loved, but can’t wear for more than a few minutes; ouch. The fourth pair were 3” block heel black pumps, ditto.
The red Keds running shoes I got are OK, a little tight, but I can wear them for hours. Not very fashionable though.
The “light bulb” finally came on. If I get heeled sandals they will allow my right foot toes some room out the side. So the 2” nude block heel sandals I got are perfect for me. I spent a whole evening at a fancy gala and never thought of my shoes at all.
My last purchase was 1/2” black ankle straps. And they feel great.
Now for the honesty. A lot of the photos I show of myself here on Kandi’s Land I am wearing the 3” stilettos. Of course these toe crunchers are removed before I head out for the evening. Great to look at, but impossible to wear. So, I’m a phoney. You can’t believe everything you see in a photo.
And truth be known, I have only ever attended one event where stilettos would have been the appropriate shoe to wear.
Now I have only four pairs of shoes. The photos only 3” stilettos, the nude sandals, the 1/2” ankle straps, and the Keds. The rest were given to thrift stores.
Plain Jocelyn, that’s me.
Love to everyone.
Jocelyn
17 Responses
Haven’t you heard the difference between a woman and a CD is a woman can’t wait to get home to take her heels off, and a CD can’t wait to get home to put them ON? Some of us closet cases wear them about the house quite a bit – I realized I was doing it maybe TOO much when one evening the kitchen counter seemed oddly high – and I realized it was because I was barefoot. Really, it happened, I don’t have the imagination to come up with that if it didn’t. and the most common culprits were size 12W 4″ stilettos.
Fiona,
And I bet you look great in your 4” shoes.
I used to wear my 3” shoes around the house, occasionally. But now I only wear one of the low heeled woman’s shoes when I go out.
Thank you for your comments.
Jocelyn
So relatable Jocelyn. I love the look of high heels on a woman. But most of mine are also just worn around the house on those rare occasions when I’m able to dress up. And then after a few hours my feet hate me. I also have some low heeled women’s boots that are stylish and very comfortable to go out in. I still think there’s nothing that quite compares to the loveliness of a women wearing high heels.
Elizabeth,
Both of us are on the same wavelength, women look great in heels. It is very hard to rationalize looks with practicality.
I like your idea of the fashionable boots. But I fear I will have the same fitting issue as with my pumps.
Thanks for commenting.
Jocelyn
Jocelyn,
I feel bad that you must deal with long, wide feet, especially because you enjoy high heels.
I like kitten heels myself. I don’t have great legs to show off (you do, by the way), so maybe that is why I focus on comfort so much. I know I am a lucky girl when it comes to shoes. I wear an 8-1/2 or 9 (women’s size), although wide shoes work best now that I am an older person with falling arches!
Keep being you, whether high or low.
Lisa
Lisa,
Thank you very much for the legs compliment. It’s funny, in some photos I think my legs look great, but in other photos they look like sticks.
If I had smaller feet I would shop in a bricks and mortar store. I’ve tried but anything above a size 10 is not stocked. With smaller feet I would try on so many different styles and heels until I got a pair that looked great and didn’t hurt after a few minutes.
The kitten heels are perfect for stylish but also sensible. You have found what works for you, and also expresses femininity. Well done.
Thank you, love,
Jocelyn
Jocelyn,
Now days you will find very few women wearing heeled court shoes , the majority find them too uncomfortable to wear all day , so don’t feel bad about the choices you make . I now go for comfort again I haven’t worn heeled court shoes for some time . I still prefer to wear heels , for the warmer weather I stick with wedges in several colours and in winter I have ankle and knee length boots with heels . I admit I miss the lovely choices of heeled court shoes in retail shops but fashion does change but I still go overboard on trainers for smarter moments . Heels are more flattering on large ( male ) feet , I am lucky as I take a UK size 8 which is the largest size normally stocked in most shops .
Teresa,
Thank you for your thoughts. I’m envious of the size of your feet.
I really understand women wanting to wear sensible shoes for comfort. Women cannot be fashionable in their footwear most of the time. Usually only for galas or upscale parties.
But when I wear heels while out, and the shoes don’t fit properly, my focus is on my sore feet and not on the friends I am with.
Unfortunately, when our community of ladies wear heels it is a big tell. Wearing heels does not allow us to blend in. Of course me in 3” heels makes me stand out at 6’ 7”.
Thanks,
Jocelyn
Jocelyn,
Try not to suffer in shoes , once you’ve injured your feet they can take weeks to recover . I am lucky with my shoe size but I have a problem with arthritis in my big toe but as Cali comments soemtimes a raised heel can be more comfortable . Most of my heels are now 2″-3″ most of the 4″ – 5″ went to charity shops but excessive heel height isn’t a problem because I’m a foot shorter at 5′ 7″ .
Teresa,
As I have aged, my shoe selection is becoming moderate. The photos show my 2” sandals and the 1/2” ankle straps. Those are my go to shoes going forward.
Being 74 years old I can get away with sensible shoes.
Thanks,
Jocelyn
Jocelyn,
should age be a total barrier , a girl does need to have fun sometimes even if it results in a little pain ! By the way I’m one year behind you at a young 73 !!!!
Jocelyn,
I’m the Iielda Marcos of Kani’s Land, i’m women’s size 10 in many brands and size 11 in narrower brands like Jessica Simpson. I switched to only women’s shoes in 2011 when I determine that I had pear shaped feet, large toe box and narrow heel. Rectanglar men’s shoes was one of the causes of my many ankle problems. I switched to high heels in 2015 after an injury. My shoe closet is down to only 60 pairs of 3.5 inch (9 cm) or higher heels now down by 20+). Many of my sandals are over 8 years old and have deteriorated, and I can’t find high enough sandals to replace them. I will wear heels some days for 16 hours straight, so fit and comfort is paramount.
Jocelyn get quality shoes THAT FIT to start with. They may couse more, but well worth the price. High heel shoe stretchers are easly available, but don’t work with plastic or synthetic materials. If you live in a college town with a women’s basketball team, look at the shoe stores close to the college (women basketball players have big feet). Look for shoes with an adjustable toe strap, get a hole punch to add extra holes.
I live by the statement: “Life’s too short fort heels that hurt.”
Cali,
Great advice, thank you.
I do find it difficult to find a shoe store that I can walk into and shop for my sizes.
I hate (and rarely do) internet shopping, but the only place I have purchased shoes in my size was online. It’s a crapshoot!
I love the quantity of shoes in your closet. “You go girl”!
Jocelyn
Plain Jocelyn…I don’t think so girl, you are looking very pretty in all your photos. Especially pic #2, I love your outfit and very partial to your skirt. I feel sorry you can’t wear high heels very long. But after wearing heels at Diva Las Vegas a year and a half ago and finding out my leg wasn’t quite ready I can relate to your issue for sure. Take care my friend.
Trish ❤️
Trish,
Thank you very much for the kind words. You are so sweet.
But pic #2 shows me in heels, but I only wore them to have the photo taken. And then back to flats. That’s why I titled this post “Let’s Be Honest”.
We have to be careful about wearing high heels. I think, with practice and the correct fit, I could spend a lot of time in stilettos, and look fabulous. Sadly, I would probably be the only woman within a hundred kilometre radius who would be wearing heels.
I hope your leg and feet are better after Diva Las Vegas.
Love you,
Jocelyn
Yeah I get your comment of being the only girl in high heels for 100 kms. It is really sad with the way cis women dress nowadays. Most wear jeans, t-shirts, runners and no make up. I just don’t get it. It’s like the don’t like being females. My legs fine now, I went to Vegas a year and a half ago. So what do Ontario folks think about being annexed by Trump. That guy is not the sharpest pencil in the box right.
Give Kandi a hug for me when you see her. Luv ya girl.
Trish ❤️
Trish,
Glad to hear your leg is fine.
I agree with you about cis women and their appearance, so sad.
I’ll send you a personal email one of these days. Kandi’s Land is not the place for political comments.
Hugs for you next month while I am in Cleveland.
Jocelyn