By Sherry Greer
Hi everyone, remember me? I apologize for my time away. Kandi hints about me occasionally that I used to write on a regular basis. I guess the reason for my sabbatical is that I just didn’t have anything in depth to say. I’ve certainly been out on a regular basis and could have documented my experience but to me, although amazingly fun, those times have been on the superficial side. Yes, I’ve gone to many places and have been around fabulous people but something was missing. I didn’t realize what that was until going with Kandi to the Erie Gala a couple of weeks ago and reading her blog about “Transitioning in Place“.
This was the second consecutive year I’ve gone with Kandi to Erie and have thoroughly enjoyed myself both times. Looking back at the few days there I realized something that puts into perspective the continuum that we all face. There were girls there ranging from “guys in a dress” to trans women that had SRS. I definitely lay somewhere in the middle but certainly closer to the latter. As I talked to and observed others I realized that we all have circumstances that challenge our ability to do what we have to do. I feel that I’m lucky to have more latitude to go out and be me than ever before. When I, and most of my friends, go out we want to “do it right”. But what does that mean? “Doing it Right” to me doesn’t mean the same as it does to you. The “guy in the dress” might be doing it right for her but that’s definitely not doing it right for me and that’s okay. We all need to be happy with who we are. We all need to support and allow others to be equally as happy.
My happy has increased and I feel myself thinking more openly and creatively. On numerous occasions I have been helping my wife around the house cleaning up or decorating for the next season and have come up with an idea that I don’t think I would have in a previous mindset. My creativity has increased dramatically because of my ability to relax and be me. In the past I closed myself and my thinking off to make sure people wouldn’t see the true me. Having an open mindset has made me a better person!
I did have one negative experience lately to all of the other positive ones. I was kicked out of another Meetup group because of me being me. I was at an outdoor event which included both male and female individuals and a few days later I went online to see pictures of the event and my account for that group was deactivated. I contacted the organizer and she said some people felt uncomfortable with me! After a few unpleasant and highly disagreeing emails we parted ways. I will show up at a future event just to say hello!!
As some of you recall I have a cis woman friend that I have gone out with a lot but not as frequent as with Kandi. She has been an amazing friend and we have grown closer because of her acceptance of me. She goes to see a counselor on a regular basis to work a few things out. I asked her once if she talks about me (male self) in her sessions and she said no but she does talk about Sherry! My friend also said that the counselor said that Sherry is a positive influence for her and that she should continue to see her! That made me feel SO good and was a wonderful validation of who I (Sherry) is.
This leads me to Kandi’s “Transitioning in Place”. I definitely have the same feelings that she described in her post. I absolutely LOVE all of the emotions and feelings that go along with Sherry. I have a definite girly girl spirit and cherish when I can go out and act upon it. The feeling of going out and being able to be me is such an amazing feeling. BUT I also love all of my male roles… being a husband, father, brother, son are all amazing and things that I cherish with all my heart. Not sure transitioning to full-time would be worth the sacrifice of losing some of those roles and possibly people involved with those roles. Anymore, regardless of my external appearance, I am always Sherry internally.
I sincerely hope that everyone finds peace in who they are and can live freely and happily. Hope you like the pictures!
The fake human being (according to Facebook) was published again!