By Sherry Greer
In a recent post Kandi talked about the two of us going to an LGBTQ event sponsored by our good friend Betty. That night was fun, a little hot, and the scenery was absolutely beautiful, the pictures were fantastic that we took. We met a few new people and found a few new places to go from our conversations. We will definitely check those places out! One new person I met has the same profession as me and we had a nice talk and compared our experiences.
As I said in my last post I haven’t written lately because I really didn’t have anything in depth and thought provoking to share. [Editorial comment: that obviously hasn’t stopped me…..] I’ve been out multiple times and could have written about those experiences but those posts would have been very superficial. Of those times out I will mention one episode. I was meeting friends at an outdoor bar to listen to a band, I got there first. After a little looking I found a place at the bar, the male bartender asked what I wanted and brought me back the beer that I ordered. Upon setting it down he responded “here’s your beer sir”! I’ve been going out for seven years and this is only the second time this has happened. It was very disappointing and made me feel awful. The alpha male bartender saw the expression on my face and gave me a half-hearted “sorry”. Fortunately my friends arrived shortly after and cheered me up!
So…the lack of writing even though I’ve been out, my recent private conversation with Tina Davis, and some changes in some people that know both sides of me has really got me reflecting on where my path is.
At the LGBTQ event Betty asked both Kandi and I where we see ourselves. Kandi has mentioned her mindset in previous posts but I don’t know if I ever have. I believe we have similar paths, I truly love being Sherry and feel that even when I’m not her I still am her. Would I fully transition or get any surgeries to feminize my face, I don’t think so. I love being the male side of me but obviously love the female side of me as well…honestly, more so. Even though I am the same person I am a different person when outwardly expressing Sherry. At first I thought there was no difference but recently I have seen and more importantly felt a difference. I think part of my not wanting to write is that my experiences have become more second nature and natural feeling. Don’t get me wrong, the ability to be out is definitely special but the novelty of the event is wearing off. (Maybe a sign of maturation?) I feel relaxed, amazing, sexy, attractive…confident (even though that guy was a jerk). Kandi introduced me to the friends I was waiting for (as well as many others ), the one, Melissa is an absolute doll and I feel incredibly female with her. She makes me come out of my shell and we just laugh and the weight of the world is shed in seconds.
Another sign of my maturity is at my job I have told 10 women about Sherry. I have gone out with most of them multiple times. It’s funny but most of my coworkers like Sherry better and rather be around her than my male self! I tend to be moody at times in male mode but much more relaxed and fun as Sherry. Many of them have changed their phone contact to Sherry instead of my male name. They also see a difference!
So, as you have read and I have felt Sherry continues to evolve and mature. I know many of you out there have felt and experienced the same and I hope you grow into the person you want to be! Of course, I hope you like the pics!
Stay beautiful, Sherry
[Editorial comment: Sher, you are my most valued friend in our little world and also my most frustrating. We have so much in common and yet could not be more different. I never understand the various windows you have to get out, but always cherish our time together. My view of the world, as someone who has to scrap to survive vs. your view as a retired government employee is also so different. But I would take a bullet for you, always know that. Let your light shine for our worldwide readership here! Share yourself with them. What you see as a routine or mundane outing may be the inspiration for a sister who is struggling. Everyone who contributes here makes actual connections with someone out there, most more so than I am able to do. Okay, I’ll shut up now.]
18 Responses
Sherry ,
I feel it’s important to keep telling our stories . When I first came out as Teresa but still firmly in the closet other people’s stories were something I clung onto , at the time I never believed it would happen for me but at least I knew others had achieved what only existed in my dreams .
I appreciate very few are full time but I hope I can show others what it means and what it takes to achieve it . I realised I didn’t need hormones or surgery to gain acceptance , I just had to believe in me . The knockbacks do happen , I find I don’t have a problem to my face but do have problems on the phone and I know that wouldn’t change even after I apply for a formal name change .
I admit I don’t like the male side of me , I have to accept that twice a year for a couple of hours but otherwise life feels very normal and perhaps my stories aren’t earth shattering to me but to others they are still a dream .
Teresa,
Thanks for the comment, I will try to post more because maybe I don’t think my story is important but maybe it gives someone inspiration to walk out the door!
Stay beautiful-Sherry
Sherry,
It is great to read a post from you. And the pictures of you are fabulous. You are beautiful.
Hey, I have met the guy side of you and you were wonderful and I enjoyed our conversation. I can’t wait to meet the real Sherry; someday.
Lots of love,
Jocelyn
Jocelyn,
Thanks love! Hopefully Sherry can meet you sometime soon ❤️.
Sherry
Sherry, it’s always good to see your thoughts on all of *this*. I firmly believe that everyone has their own path, but it is helpful for others to see the steps along the way. Your work colleagues who know prefer Sherry, I think that is an amazing sign of acceptance and support. Your pictures are great as usual, I love the pink heels and the floral top with the black shorts.
Tina,
Thanks! Everytime one of them tells me they changed my contact info I tear up from the love and support ❤️.
Sherry
Sherry–I believe you have had the same experience as me i.e. those who know the 2 sides of me indicate that I am a different person when en femme but I don’t have any self awareness that this is going on.
Emily,
I used to think there was no difference but as things progress there’s a distinct change in almost everything about me. These changes make me feel amazing!
Sherry
Sherry,
I forgot to mention the attitude of GG friends and work colleagues . I was surprised by the acceptance of women , whether they fully understand the reasons or not . For a long time I discussed the pros and cons of returning to my art group as Teresa , I needn’t have worried , it didn’t take long before they became comfortable with me to the point where they forgot about my male side and took me into their confidence . I feel it’s for a number of reasons , obviously we tend to be happier because we are who we prefer to be but also women trust other women especially when they’ve bumped into you when using the women’s toilets .
I couldn’t agree more!
Very good post Sherry, I indeed have seen your progress via this blog and much like Kandi I can see how much more beautiful you have become
I love being out when I go and just the other day I actually did some clothes shopping something I’ve not done in a while
I enjoyed it so much and when I went to the Mac counter to buy my foundation the young man greeted me with hello beautiful
Oh I loved that so much and made me feel so good being me.
The world is becoming more friendly I do believe. We just need to be ourselves and love each other and we will find success
Such an amazing feeling 🤗☺️
Hi Sherry . Thanks for sharing your stories and your experiences and most of all your beautiful photos. You look amazing. Sorry that narrow minded bar tender almost ruined your night. You are an inspiration to someone like me. I look forward to all the stories here , just wish I had more time to read them! I hope one day that we can meet and go out together and share the experience. Until please keep sharing stories and of course beautiful photos 😘
Chris,
Thank you for your comments. Everyone’s input has given me inspiration to write more!
Sherry
Sherry, love the photos and thanks for taking the time to talk about yourself and your mindset. Welcome to the “being Trans but not transitioning club.” Like you, my mindset is of Christina whether I am dressed or not. I am not as out of the house as you are however. Hopefully 1 day. That’s amazing that you are out to your co-workers and they even have you down as Sherry in their address book. That must make you feel so wonderful and affirmed.
I love my female side, and feel it is more my authentic self. My male side feels a bit fraudulent in retrospect. It was my carapace to hide my more vulnerable female side. My male side is ok. It is functional. I can blend in with society to get things done but it is not genuine. I didn’t realize how not genuine it was until my egg cracked a few years ago and I came out to myself first as a CD, then gender fluid, then Trans. I peeled back the layers over years to slowly stop the denials and repression. So outwardly I am have tall muscular body and inward I have this soft demure lady that is more authentic.
Sherry keep being you!
-Christina
Christina,
Thank you SO much for your comments especially the “trans but not transitioning club” one. I definitely feel that I am Sherry all the time. I definitely love the fact that some of my coworkers have changed my contact info. They see the real me❤️. I have no choice but to be me! Love you!
Stay beautiful-Sherry
Sherry, – What stands out in these photos is how happy you look.
Cali,
Thanks for noticing, I can’t help but to smile ☺️.
Sherry