“What are you using for breast enhancement? It’s definitely working …”
From a great friend and a Contributor.
I have been asked that question a few times.
First of all, before Kandi, I still believe I had enough pectoral muscles that when pushed together, they could look like something. I have worked out my entire adult life, a day isn’t a day until I do something (now being elderly, it’s not what it was). In the days of buying lingerie, putting it on and then disposing of it like toxic waste, I always thought there was something there, but I wasn’t educated enough to know how to shop for and buy the correct bra.
Since then, I have stopped weightlifting (allowing what I had to get looser, less firm) and lost weight, so on a relative basis, they look bigger.
Now, fast forward to about 3 years ago. I have an enlarged prostate, which required a biopsy and now I am on my 3rd annual MRI. I am also on medication, Finasteride. If you Google that, you will see one of the possible side effects is enlarged breasts. And I have on and off taken various supplements. You can Google that and will see various options (I don’t like disbursing medical advice in any fashion). I know that I do want larger breasts but know where the line is where I would stop. My biggest pet peeve is that I have asymmetrical breasts. That requires a larger insert for my right breast (the weak sister) than for my left (the showstopper). I am currently taking a supplement literally started a few days before this was written, but I have indulged before. I want better girls, no question. I talked recently about wearing a bra very frequently. I am trying to allow myself to just be…a woman in any way possible in every minute of every day. Fifty years of self-loathing is difficult to just move beyond.
I can walk down the beach as you saw in a recent post and look like a woman up top, but I can also walk down the beach in male mode without raising any eyebrows.
On top of all of that, most males over the age of 60s have breasts of some type. Just a fact.
Finally, I know how to use the proper enhancements, be they push-up bras and/or various types of inserts. I am very good at that (inserts and a push-up bra were used in my boudoir shoot), I am not sloppy like many I have seen where the inserts are popping out or are clearly visible. It’s all about the details. Pay attention ladies.
More to it than you thought, huh?
Bottom line, I really know what I am doing, both as Kandi and to keep any of it from being obvious as a male. I also always have plausible deniability with the prostate issue. If I get a question by anyone, my immediate response would be I can have breasts or die of prostate cancer, which would diffuse that pretty quickly.
We all have a superpower of some type, which we may or may not be aware of. Mine is 1,000% being Kandi. I have mastered the ability to navigate the world on my own terms, given my life circumstances and those resources available to me, to find joy in this persona that I inhabit and create goodwill with those I interact with. This is not my bloated ego speaking, it is fact and many, many that know me, meet me, hang with me, have witnessed it. Now, that and $10 won’t cover the Manhattan I am nursing while writing at a bar in Cleveland’s wonderful Gordon Square neighborhood, pending an evening at the art museum, after getting involved with the museum’s Women’s Council (more about this coming to a blog near you). I still marvel that no one questions me, they immediately accept me and that is because I understand the landscape of this place known as Kandi’s Land!
It’s good to have girls!
Makes me happy.
Editorial comment: EVERYTHING posted here was displayed in front of hundreds and hundreds of actual human beings. No silicone was harmed in the making of these awesome memories!
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I received the following on Facebook Messenger recently from someone I did not nor do not know.
The photos you see are my story on the “About” page here. And THAT is why I do this…
11 Responses
Kandi,
I knew many years ago that I could naturally fill a B cup so It doesn’t take much to push up to my accepted C cup , it goes without saying that the right bra can present them to their best . I have no need to go larger as my shape is in balance , I ‘m happy comfortable and so confident in how I look , I know I can take a size 12/ 14 (UK) off the rack and it will fit . Most of us like ample boobs but some are more sensible than others , obviously it depends on how you want to be seen and accepted .
Now lets get to the real problem , “HAIR ! ” I accept that I need to shave everyday so there is never any stubble , some suggest waxing but the problem is you can only wax when it has grown for a few days which is little use to me .
I admit at first I was very aware of my breasts and concerned I might upset some people but I realised they accepted me for the my acquired shape so I don’t play around with different sizes . Most of the people I meet in my art groups etc. are about my age , I have been so surprised how many have survived breast cancer , so many are relying on various forms to keep their femininity . I have the highest respect for them , in that context I feel quite humbled to be accepted by them as Teresa .
Teresa,
I’m going to address facial hair. I started shaving at the age of 11, first one in my classes with a mustache. I hate shaving, just tired of it. Waxing is not the solution for exactly the reason you said. (I do wax several other parts of my body with great results.) The only thing left is laser removal. Kandi use to have a ‘Nood’ ad up. I have a version but have been too busy to figure out how to use. I really need to do this because I hate shaving!
Here there are two options: salon or self.
It’s up to you are your finances. However, they work best with dark hair, so as you grey they are less effective.
Cali,
I know all about early facial hair , so I accept shaving is the easiest and cheapest choice . I couldn’t say what colour my hair is as it’s always shaved that includes face and body . Under my wig I have retained short and very grey hair , the reason being vanity , I may not have much but it matters when I see my grandsons ( once or twice a year ) . I pop into a very nice Lithuanian lady every six weeks and have it trimmed , I still go as Teresa , pop my wig on it’s stand and when she’s done I pop it back on , she always smiles and tells me how much better I look !
I really don’t find it a chore everyday , it doesn’t take long but importantly I’ve found the right combination of items to shave with
It’s interesting how so many of us want natural breast. I’ve just recently began wishing I did, now I do have a small natural cup and have been using estrogen cream and hopping that may help some as well but I know it’s prob a very slow process
Like you Kandi I’ve really embraced the women in me and I’m sure she ain’t going anywhere
So, two things from me.
First, being the contributor-half mentioned at the start that helped set this post in motion, I want more! Show us how you do it Kandi! We want those details! Make us look better!
Second, now that the direction has spun off into shaving, (sorry your post has now been hijacked Kandi …) I’ll kill the post I’d started writing on the subject and get to the crux of it for me. In a different email to Kandi a few weeks ago, while suffering from severe razor burn, I said to Kandi I’d over-shaved. She said you can’t. My chest said otherwise … It was all started by the fact that my thick chest hair can’t be removed with hair-remover products. it just doesn’t shift, everywhere else is fine, just not the chest. So it’s shaving. But, for some reason, probably connected, even shaving doesn’t completely remove it to skin level. So it gets shaved with every type of razor I can find until it gets to an acceptable level. By which time I’m at the point of no return … So I went looking for products and my darling was a huge help. The first I found is called PURE by Gillette Venus. Said to contain manuka honey and vanilla. Don’t care what it contains, it worked way better than a shave foam and didn’t irritate in any way even when I pushed it again. And felt so good after use. Made in the USA so probably tariff-free …
The next was organised by my darling as she knew it would help. The Schick Intuition Shaver (also US made, you win again) is awesome. You have all seen and probably used the razors with lubrication strips, well this one has an oversized almost soap-like border that lubricates and smooths when wet. Don’t expect the closest of shaves but for after chemicals or after the usual shave just keep this one handy. Mine lives in the shower. I found myself using it continuously because it just felt so smooth and so good afterwards. Great on the arms and legs. And chest in my case. The negatives are that the blades block easily (so it’s best for maintenance not for round one) and the soap surround can break down and break off. But that’s a small price to pay.
Next week I have my first ever chest waxing. It will be a disaster. And in fact I’m picking it will end after the first rip. The hair is just too thick and strong. And it doesn’t help that my brow girl, who is doing it, and is part of Team Maddie, has been sending laughing emojis while offering numbing cream! I’m actually more worried about redness and damage, with my first ever girl’s night out two days later, than the pain.
The whole thing for me remains a work in progress.
(Sorry Kandi, just blame me …)
Love the passion!!!!
Waxing takes time to get use to. I hated my first leg waxing 10 years ago. Now I only need to wax my legs once or twice a year; women that wax me are jealous. You WILL be red for about 16 hours, after that things will calm down. I had my 4th Brazilian last week, and I am not use to the hair pulling down under, BUT hope it will improve over time. I only have had one chest waxing, mainly to see the extent of brushing from my rib injury. Over two years later, I still have major brushing. It was only a little painful, no where near the down under pull. Cut your chest hair to about 1/4 inch before the appointment.
You’ve heard that beauty can be painful.
And expensive. Usually painful and expensive. She did my ears for the first time last time. That was pain I could accept. She offered to do inside my nose – that’s a bridge too far …
Pun intended …
We all love you and what you have created here!
I too have asymmetrical boobs. Had two large fat tumors removed from the right one, so it needs extra help. I use boob tape to help create a more symmetric shape by pulling the material from under my arm. And don’t forget a little dark shadow to enhance the contour.