Officer Kandi

Miss me?

Since my last current adventure post, the HRC gala, I have been busy. Many non-Kandi activities including driving the truck to create the time off to go to Chicago to visit our daughters, said Chicago trip, sales calls to Michigan and, of course, the greatest thing on the planet, The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame Induction Ceremonies! I had been able to get out and stretch my Kandi legs, but blog maintenance and writing didn’t fit the schedule. This is what I was up to.

October 4, 2024 MIX, The Cleveland Museum of Art. I had to miss last month’s MIX, a rarity over the past decade (worldwide pandemics excluded). Some highlights:

More than one of the security guards, as I was walking in, welcomed me “back”, noting my absence the last Mix. Sharon, an African-American woman walked over to me at my post for close to that decade, asking me where I was last month. She told me she thought she was in the wrong place last month since I was not there, telling me I am always so pretty.

Sheila was walking by, sort of eying me. She then asked if I worked events for the American Heart Association, which of course, I have. Remembered frequently. A gentleman sort of cautiously walked up to me and asked if I was Kandi. Ends up he saw me at the Stalker Jane premier and is a Facebook friend (who knew?). He himself is a local movie maker, having recently produced (don’t laugh) “Meat, the Movie”. I chided him with a smile and told him next time he shoots a film, he needs to include me.

Overall a great evening, my first in a very long time completely dry (and I get three free cocktails, which I gifted to a few folks). It concluded a six day dry stretch, resulting in my loss of five pounds and a lingering headache, probably withdrawal. I am by no means attempting to get completely sober, but what I am trying to do is make a cocktail (“a” cocktail) a treat and not how I hydrate daily. I never could have one drink, it was like Lays, you can’t drink just one. By the time you read this, that stretch may or may not be greatly extended.

October 5, 2024 I watched Will & Harper. If you read this blog, then you MUST watch this movie. It completely spoke to me. I am no Will Farrell fan, I think he seems to be a good guy, but he rarely makes me laugh. I just don’t find him funny (same with Adam Sandler, looks like a good dude, absolutely unfunny). But in this movie, he was wonderful and actually funny. It is a documentary about his friend, Harper, who is transitioning at just about the same age as me. Very, very relatable. I heard quite a bit of myself in her. The difference, I still have never felt wrong as a man, I just always feel wonderful as a woman. But being a woman is like a high, not sustainable 24/7/365, for me.

October 6, 2024 I had my first drink after seven days dry. This was a great thing because I had one drink, one single drink. I took about an hour and a half to sip it and that was that. Control. Something I had not had for quite some time. If I can continue infrequent and controlled drinking, I will be on the path to be who I want to be. And oh yeah, dropped eight pounds in this process with little adjustment otherwise. The drinking lead to eating too much. No and light drinking leads to eating what I want in moderation. I still have a treat every day, but it is one treat, not a box of cookies followed by a bowl of ice cream. Now it is two or three cookies.

October 8, 2024, my latest movie, “The Deadly Type”, in a scene titled “crime scene investigators”. This my second movie with this director, having done the wonderful Grace & Mercy with him. The premier was great fun! I have lost count of movies I have been in now, a good problem, I would imagine. Check me out on a free movie streaming service near you!

The set, we shot inside the warehouse

I played a crime scene detective. No lines, background. My role was in the background of the principal scene, ducking under the crime scene tape and having a conversation with two other detectives. Pretty sure I will get more than a few seconds of screen time, the only question being how far in the back of the scene I will be. The film, as noted is being directed by my Grace & Mercy director and the assistant was the director on Stalker Jane. I am slowly building a local resume of great unpaid gigs.. Love my outfit, rather my character’s outfit.

As of the day this post runs, I have not dressed since the movie shoot. I do not see anything for the next few days at least. This is far and away the longest such stretch since we got the Kandi experience all cranked up in 2015. I have gone from about three times a week to lately, maybe three times a month. I gotta say……I haven’t missed it (for now). That said, I have filled the time with many different activities and experiences to keep my mind occupied otherwise, but still….. I also have resumed drinking, but maintained that control I talked about above. Every day brings new challenges. Not sure what it all means and it may well snap right back in place soon. There are a bunch of plates up in the air.

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5 Responses

  1. Kandi,
    It is great to read about your activities. Since your are a dear friend, I am comforted knowing you are safe and happy.

    Losing weight, ah-h-h, something I should be doing. Not drinking alcohol, I do that exceptionally well.

    Love you,
    Jocelyn

  2. Kandi, The Dective,

    Old acquaintance. Great story. Keep up the good work on all possible fronts.

    MarAnne

  3. Kandi,

    I totally agree with you on the movie “Will and Harper”. I saw so much of myself in this movie. The joy, pain, laughter, crying, support from friends, and hatred that is still out there.

    Because of my work, we have to do mandatory training each year and DEI is one of the subjects. However, very rarely, if not at all, do they ever cover in detail LGBTQ issues. I wish they would make this a mandatory viewing for the workers at my company. It would make it so much easier to come out full time if they would.

    Best to you and the other readers!

  4. Paula,
    I guess it would be very difficult to cover the whole LGBTQ spectrum , which group gets the most coverage ? Sometimes I feel we lack support by being grouped together .
    I was in a three way conversation with a thirty year old divorced lady and a guy who after many years of married life with children and grandchildren is now married to a guy . The lady was intrigued by our stories and soon realised how different the situation was for gay people compared with transgender .Unless a gay person choose to talk about their situation you would never know whereas a transgender person is visibly obvious , this was the time when I chose to appear as Teresa to my art group after months of deliberation , their acceptance was wonderful . The bottom line for many companies is openly employ transgender people , there would be less money wasted on training programs .

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