“Lovebug”

When she brought me the pancakes I ordered, she said “Here you go, Lovebug!”. I liked that. We’ll get back to this in a moment.

So here I am primping for my usual pre-outing photo shoot. On this Sunday, July 18, 2021, I was scheduled to work at Mercury Theatre for the afternoon matinee. Since my duties only take an hour, I made a morning of it.

This is a great dress! You know the story, thrift store bargain. I always love royal blue and liked the white complementary color and the use of gold in my earrings, ring and purse. I received quite a few complements on my dress on this day.

I started the day with 11:00 Mass. While I had no verbal interaction with anyone, people sat all around me and during the sign of peace, I was treated like anyone else. Normally I leave before Mass is over, but on this day, I exited with everyone else. There is just something about sitting in church well dressed. I enjoy the up and down, tucking my dress underneath me as I sit, crossing my legs, sitting with perfect posture, just being a woman.

I then headed to the clothing exchange and swapped four items for two new dresses that I must say, look fabulous! A woman working there told me she thought my dress was very pretty!

After this, I went to a local diner in an area of town that is very open. The waitress and I had an immediate connection. She started by calling me “love” and then progressed to “lovebug”. I’ll be back there for sure!

As I was crossing the street to get back to my car, a woman was pulling out of a parking lot and waived me across. She then told me as I was walking in front of her car that she loved my dress!

Finally, I reported to work and just had a lovely time there, playfully interacting with the patrons. I am simply in my element when interacting with patrons, be they here at Mercury, at the art museum, the folks I encountered at Space Jam or wherever. One of my fellow ushers told me I was stunning. “Good stunning or bad stunning?” I always ask. That was very sweet of her.

I looked very pretty, I was told that I was very pretty, I was out amongst people in four different places. A perfect Sunday!

_________________________________________________________________________________________

Random Thoughts: I never really feel specifically “masculine” or “feminine”. I just feel different versions of happy or happier. It’s not like when I woke up on the day discussed above, I felt like a man and then when what you see was said and done, I felt like a woman. In my head, I just feel good about myself on a particular day. Certainly, when dressed, I act in a more feminine fashion, but what I see through my eyes, my view of the world doesn’t magically change. I certainly do different things and am viewed differently by the world based on my outward presentation.

Once I accepted myself and the person you know as Kandi was born, so to speak, what I feel like as “me” morphed, but doesn’t effectively change based upon my outfit for the day. Many of the Kandi traits are exhibited when I am home as a husband, or running a race or playing pickleball. I certainly act in the gender I am presenting, but in my head, no switch is flipped. I just feel more complete, I guess.