This is a repeat, a fabulous repeat!
As we continue this June 11, 2021 day, we left off with our girl headed for home after a wonderful evening. But it was only 8:30 and I wanted more time in my dress! Plus an almost two week Kandi shutdown was lurking on the horizon. So I decided to head to an area (Independence for my two Cleveland readers) with a bunch of restaurant options. I was going to stop at the sports bar I was at the previous week, where I talked sports with the gentleman seated near me. Something drew me to the site of the final Kandi’s Supper Club, The Oak Barrel. The parking lot was full, the patio near capacity and this girl was feeling her oats as she walked in.
One seat was open in a rather humid bar, along the right side of the square U shaped bar. As I sit down two African-American ladies are getting up and I locked eyes with one of them. I smiled and she gently laid her hand on my shoulder as she left. That painted a broad smile on my face and the bartender greeted me. I asked for a wine list and selected a pinot noir. She brought me my drink, which I told her would be the only drink for the night and called me “Dear”. I sat, smiling in a full bar, and enjoyed my wine. I then asked for my check as a lovely woman asked me if the two seats to my immediate right were open. I told her they were all hers and we made some small talk while she awaited her husband and I awaited my check.
I give the bartender the check and my credit card only to be informed that my drink was taken care of. Oh my! A woman, seated across the bar with her husband or date, bought my drink. The bartender would only tell me that once she left the restaurant. Wow! Now the woman seated next to me, her husband seated, says she’ll buy me another drink if I stay. I order another glass, but tell her it was not necessary that she pays for my drink. An almost hour conversation between the three of us ensues, as if we were life long friends.
During our conversation, another bartender comes up to me and asks if I work at CMA (the art museum). He knew me (and no, I didn’t know him)! He then informed me the second glass of wine I was enjoying was on the house. What a night! I order a third glass simply to extend the wonderful conversation I was having. As I was chatting with my new friends, a lovely woman comes up behind me and excuses herself to tell me how beautiful she thought I was (yeah, I know, but she did seem to have eyesight)! Could the night get any better?
So I finally pay for one glass of wine and did what I felt obligated to do, pay it forward. I basically gave the bartender a 200% tip and thanked her for a remarkable evening. I bid my new friends farewell (they were visitors to Cleveland and left with a story to tell, I am sure). Casey, this wonderful new friend of mine asked if I gave hugs when I told them I had to leave. Me? Hugs? You know I gave her a warm hug and thanked her for being so sweet. I won’t bore you with the details of our conversation, but it was all over the board. Sports, where we grew up, restaurants, concerts, places to visit in town, their professions, the food, etc… Like I said, it was as if we had simply decided as friends to meet there. And not one single mention of my attire. I was accepted as the worthwhile human being I am.
Proudly being who I am, beaming with joy and happiness, living my life, this has always paid me huge dividends as Kandi. Me, no one would have even noticed me. Kandi, she is a ray of light and I am privileged to be along for the ride.
This was my outfit this day…
15 Responses
How totally awesome Kandi !! Great to hear there are so many cool folks out there !! 🙂
There are indeed, Sammy! You never know until you try. 😀
Kandi,
Even though I already heard this story in person, it again brought a smile to my face as I was reading 🤗. I’m glad you had a great time!
Stay beautiful-Sherry
😊 Me too! Thanks Sher!!
Kandi,
As Gaudio and Parker wrote:
“Oh, what a night.
Why’d it take so long to see the light,
Seemed so wrong, but now it seems so right.
What a lady, what a night.”
This song seems to fit your night.
Jocelyn
Don’t think I don’t know my Four Seasons!
Kandi,
What a Wonderful story and glorious memories of an similar experience I had a Few years back. It was not as spectacular as yours but it was a pleasant and perfectly comfortable evening out. Thank You for the memory prompt.
Marie Anne
It just proves, you never know….
Happy to do that for you, Marie!!
This line says it all to me: “I was accepted as the worthwhile human being I am.” That is the most beautiful reason for continuing to do what we do. We are all worthwhile human beings and deserve to be visible, accepted, and loved for who we are. Thank you, Kandi, for a truly wonderful ending to your evening. ❤
Don’t thank me, I simply showed up! Thank the general kindness of strangers, there are far more good ones than not!
Such a great story of your night.
With all the crap and ugliness we see on our news and such I really think that people in general are more friendly and kind than we give them credit.
I think we assume to much about folks sometimes
This story shows that so well, I think when folks out there see that trans people are pretty much like them but just a bit different in how they look or yes even speak the world will be a better place and Kandi you certainly make it a better place
Thanks for sharing
Rach, I am delighted to share! I believe it is the confidence I project that draws this type of reaction. If we act comfortable with ourselves, then others are immediately comfortable as well. Thanks my dear!!
Rachel,
You make a very good point , perhaps the problem is many people work and sometimes live in isolation , social media is no substitute for human contact to show true feelings and kindness .
Kandi is so right in her reply confidence is the key , people will pick up on that and include you in their lives .
I know too many people now to wonder whether they consider me trans or not , I never talk about it because they never ask , after six years+ as Teresa that’s probably not surprising . Looking back I feel it’s an issue we need to get over especially going full time , saying that I do get the occasional kick back , the way to deal with them is totally ignore them and move the conversation along or walk away .
What a beautiful story of kindness and acceptance. Of course, your confidence and caring nature itself brings out that in others.
Frannie,
While I do know how I act allows me to get treated so well, this time I was simply noticed and that was wonderful!
Love you dear!!