Normality…

I hadn’t realized the inordinate amount of time, as compared to the actual paltry return, that I put into the apparel line I recent lost. Honestly, the loss of income was slight, it was the promise of something more that kept me pushing. Also, the possibility of earning a living in a fashion circumstance, was enticing.

After fully submerging myself into it for about two years, maybe I was fooling myself. Without that, I find I have tremendous amounts of free time, something that hadn’t existed for quite a while. Now before you say having that time is a good thing, only time will tell as we’ll see where I go to fill that expected revenue hole. As I have said, we do alright each and every day, living a solidly middle-class life. We do what we enjoy, food on the table, bills paid. But we both work tirelessly and that elusive retirement, for a couple in their early-mid 60’s is still a dream. Any significant health problem, certainly an issue for anyone, would be a financial issue we may not be able to bear. That means we grind because of the “what if” in life. There is no nest egg, just a thin safety net.

So…I have an open Sunday, I have really nothing to do while my wife is working, so it’s back to church. This is the church I have not been to since the pastor retired last summer. Not because I made a decision not to go, it’s just that the time was spent otherwise, including on pickleball. April 13, 2025, Palm Sunday, I attended 11:00AM services. I have said this before and I mean it, if I could only do one single thing as Kandi, as often as is possible, it would be to go to this church each and every Sunday. I am truly blessed by my affiliations with CIFF, the art museum, the numerous charities I serve, trips to Erie and Keystone, my friends and they are many, you all here and most of all, the complete freedom afforded by The Angel Known as My Wife. But that place is truly special, and it checks many, many Kandi boxes.

• ✅Complete acceptance
• ✅Wear so many different outfits and outfit options
• ✅Friends a plenty
• ✅Fills my soul
• ✅Ego boosting compliments, always and without fail
• ✅Complete peace and it is the only place where my mind completely relaxes
• ✅I am valued in a way that supersedes my value elsewhere
• ✅Simple logistics, it’s an easy time of the week to slip away
• ✅Hugs, hugs, hugs and my simple presence is noticed and admired
• ✅I think you get the point

I needed to get ready earlier than the time of the service would require allowing my wife the bathroom to get ready for work. Here you see my outfit. This is simply perfection! No, I would not turn heads or even be noticed in many circumstances. But each and every portion of the outfit spoke to a 60+ year old woman going to church. From my hair to the makeup to the glasses selected to the mock turtleneck, to the sweater, the necklace and accessories, the skirt, perfect hose and shoes I absolutely adore! My new purse was the chef’s kiss. As I walked downstairs, my wife told me I looked very nice. It was done as a simple part of a conversation about our pending days.

The day was delightful. I ran a bunch of errands, some that required no other human interaction, some that did. I hit two banks (overnight drawers), did some recycling, made a big Kandi clothing donation (as the Byrds said “To everything, purge, purge, purge”, okay they didn’t exactly say that), hit the Home Depot and reloaded the liquor cabinet. I entered the church as usual, about 20 minutes before things started. I like to do this for two reasons. One, to simply sit and be. I am never more at peace that sitting in a pew at church. It is the only place I completely relax. Not thinking about what I need to do, where I need to go, is my wife comfortable, is dinner ready, does the grass need cut, on and on and on. I truly sit naturally lady-like, legs crossed, phone off, hands in my lap, just breathing. Just doing this, without moving a muscle, brings five to ten people over to me to say hello, hug me, shake my hand, or simply give me a big smile.

The other reason I do this is to see people react to me, instead of I to them. Many, many stopped to say hello as mentioned above, including the new (to me) preacher. This is an accepting, proactively so, space. My simply being there is incredibly valued. I saw at CIFF and the museum many fellow congregation members of late, who wanted to see me there again. Let’s just say I was rewarded for making the effort and my soul was nourished on this day.