By Maddie Smith
Yes, I’ve been absent, and no, I haven’t written anything lately; I have lots of reasons but no excuses really.
The main reason is that life has still been getting in the way – and this time some of that has been awesome! I mentioned or alluded to the fact there was lots going on in the last piece I wrote, which I think was back in the Jurassic period it seems so long ago. And because of all that, there have been few opportunities to let Maddie loose.
The most awesome thing is that last year I was married. Said I’d never do it but when you find the one, well it’s a no-brainer. The fact it is to the one who discovered Maddie makes life so much easier. No ‘having the conversation’ moments for me, or hiding anything. In fact, there was even a (lingerie) present for Maddie under the Christmas tree this year. Never for one moment do I take for granted the situation I’m in and how lucky I am.
There was also a honeymoon, well a pre-honeymoon we are calling it as we hope to do a bigger trip to the US in the future. The destination was Melbourne, my favourite Australian city and one I’ve been to many times (I’m sure Dee will understand why). It was a shopping and shows trip. So good was it that we went back a second time later in the year as we found some cheap airfares and there was another show to see!
But the biggest problem of recent times (and let’s exclude the bouts of covid and other such things, like the weather) has been work. As it is across the rest of the world, the economy here is a big issue, and that includes for my customers, who are primarily in the leisure industry. The outcome of that in mid ’23 was that I needed to find some additional income and the fastest way was to grab a job with someone else. It solved the problem, but it was near 30 years since I’d worked for someone else. It could have been great, it should have been great, but in this case, it wasn’t a good thing and that is a long story all on its own … Still, needs must when there is a wedding to pay for.
And then, late that year, N’s company restructured, and she was made redundant …
Ya have to be kidding …
I was very proud of my girl; she found a better job, with more pay, in the same industry and was working again just two days after her final day at the previous job. She is the poster girl for getting s%#t done.
The wedding was fantastic. Maddie’s makeup artist did the wedding and was also an invited guest as she is now firmly in the friend category. There was, of course, a makeup trial, I wasn’t going to miss that, and it was another great chance to learn more from the best.
Towards the end of 2024 I escaped from the job, and although income is reduced at the moment, I’m rebuilding my existing and new clientele and hoping they all have a great 2025. If they do, I will …
But while all of that is going on, and I don’t get to dress 100 days a year like some here, that doesn’t mean it isn’t an every day thought. It is. How could it not be if you enjoy reading Kandi’s blog every day?
And to be honest, the planning is half the fun!
While I realise more and more that while we are all the same in so many ways, I’m never going to want to live as Maddie fulltime, or go out 100 days a year, or let a wider group know or meet Maddie, or enjoy the amazing lives some of you girls live. But I do want more, and working from home again will definitely allow that to happen a few more times than twice a year.
So, after all that (and I apologise that this is selfish piece with no educational value, but then, what could I teach you girls?) I’ve made myself a bit of a checklist to work through over the coming months.
The first was done for me (and not by me) – my brow lady now knows why I want her to push the envelope next time. She was apparently chuffed to be added to the closed group. Now I can get better shape, which will undoubtedly lift the appearance and has been needed for some time. And of course, I can now show her photos so she can see the end game. Could be a gamechanger.
The second is more makeup lessons. If there is any one thing I would tell anyone else in our position, it would be to search out a MUA who will work with you and keep your confidence. Scariest thing I’ve ever done, but the best and we now have a friend for life.
However, ironically, during the lessons I have yet to have her go from start to finish to see what can be done. Usually, I’ve done foundation in advance or we’ve worked on just one area, such as eyes and false lashes. Over Christmas I started the groundwork to find another one or two artists to do lessons with. I want to see how someone else tackles it, but also, I want to do that start to finish makeover. I guess the group with ‘the knowledge’ will get wider. Things are progressing with finding someone. While most of you are getting slammed by snowstorms, it is summer here. Shaving my legs isn’t an option so I might wait until it cools a bit before the lessons so I can wear a wider range of outfits. Or just get more lessons!
Next, I need to do a few better photos. Part of my income is derived from photography, so I have the equipment to get the results. I think in the last piece I wrote I said something about being happy with what I created to the point I would have been happy to step outside the door. Looking at the photos from that shoot I can’t see it. They didn’t do justice to what I achieved on the day.
The thing is, I’m my own worst critic, so seeing in the mirror a look I would have risked outside the door, but not capturing that, was very frustrating. And while they say the camera doesn’t lie, trust me, sometimes it does; some of my income relies on being very skilled with Photoshop to correct those errors. However, I will never use any program to edit my own photos as I want the real results. (But I used to regularly use apps to test out clothing or wigs when I didn’t have time for makeup. None of those photos will ever see the light of day, they were just a tool).
My BFF is also a work colleague and works with me on photoshoots. She always gets my photos but has yet to meet Maddie in person, but only because we haven’t managed to align the ducks. She is happy to do a photoshoot for me so that will solve both issues. She has also always said that she will be there the first time I want to go out. Great having two women who have my back.
Finally, there is always the big one – the first trip out. That may happen this year but I’m not stressed if it doesn’t. That said, this winter may be the opportunity. So much easier to layer clothing to hide things at that time of year. Maybe a museum or a movie, followed by coffee.
Meantime though, there are a few other things to do. Working from home lets me throw on a pair of heels at any time for more practice. I’m also keen to spend a full day dressed, from breakfast to bedtime, something I’ve never done before. And there is always lots of makeup practice that can be done between jobs.
2025 will hopefully be a great year for all of us. I’m looking forward to more Maddie and even a brief trip to the US at the end of the year if things go to plan.
It will be interesting to look back at this piece twelve months from now to see how many of those things I can tick off the list.
Happy New Year everyone!
5 Responses
Maddie,
Great to hear from you.
Congratulations on your marriage. And fabulous that your spouse knows and accepts both sides of you.
I’ve been shaving my legs for years, and wearing shorts and swimming trunks when weather is appropriate. They are smooth full time. No comments from anyone on my clean legs, never. Go for it.
Your first outing will be a little scary but please do it sooner than later. All the ladies here will tell you that it is wonderful and nobody will really take any notice of you. But make sure you follow Kandi’s four rules of the road.
Glad to hear from you.
Jocelyn
Maddie,
A belated Happy New Year to you and congratulations with your marriage .
At times we are a contradiction , you wish to be out more but not possibly fulltime and yet you wish for the perfect makeup , I understand that as I’ve lived it .
The problem is the more we do it the net gradually gets wider , I reached the point where the net was so wide it made sense to make a definite decision and one which I haven’t regreted .
Also the more we do it we step beyond the need for perfection , I certainly don’t aim to be the perfect woman everyday , the mundane jobs have to be tackled as much as the more glamourous ones , I had to prove to myself it was possible . At first I did opt for male mode but so many women now do the same work that was once in the male domain , so once I’ve woken I’m Teresa the rest of the day until bedtime , it feels so normal now .
I retired from being a professional photographer after thirty years when digital started to take over , I’m very much pre-photshop where we had to learn the skills of negative or print retouching . I still miss the magic of darkroom work where you never knew what shots you had achieved until the final print or transparency was made . Does the camera lie ? As a professional we had to learn the tricks to bend the rules with lighting or the right lens .
Jocelyn is right , people don’t notice shaved legs , I even had to tell my wife before she realised . I also agree with her on the opportunity to step outside into the RW , it helps to resolve so many issues , we have so many fears in our heads which often prove to be false fears . We need that exposure to find a balance and obviously build confidence , I will add it is addictive .
Maddie,
Happy New Year and congratulations on your marriage.
I would suggest you get the full makeup from a clean fresh face. You will learn so much more on how to lay down your foundation.
I also get my brows waxed on a regular basis. My brows and eyelashes grow together very fast (side effect of eye drops); either trim my lashes or clean up my brows.
I have been getting my legs waxed for about 9 years and I wear short shorts (3 -5 inch inseam) as much as possible. I need hairless skin to tape my legs. I now have very faint, short, light colored hair, so my legs look hairless all the time (then add heels or knee highs). I never had a comment either way on them. I still need to get the legs wax because any hair interferes with the tape.
Walking around in your house in high heels is a good start. You need to learn how to navigate the real world. You will never understand how to negotiate a slight slant in heels until you must. I hope you walk around in your heels outside in your yard. The difference is like learning to ride a bicycle with training wheels and then having to ride a penny-farthing.
Again, congratulations on your marriage.
Cali
Thank you ladies for your comments and kind wishes.
First – vive la difference.
Maddie is part of me, she doesn’t define me. Letting her physical side out is great and I love it, but if it never happened ever again, well, I’d survive. It wouldn’t change me. And there is where I diverge from most of you. Some have described this as a hobby for many of us. It’s more than that though, although hobby is closer to my position than a life-changing realisation.
And as for the shaving, well, the previous sentence probably answers that. But to add to that further, think of the last time you watched M*A*S*H and think Klinger with a beard, and that’s the amount of hair I deal with. It’s a three day process to prepare for a full transformation Maddie day. And if I can’t do it properly, I won’t do it at all. Shaved legs is something for winter. There is no way I’m explaining to anyone the difference between shaved legs and the rest of me during summer for the 99.2% of the time I’m not presenting as Maddie. I’ll just work within the imitations and enjoy it when I can cut loose. It should be fun not stressful. Explaining would be the latter. For now it’s enough explaining why I have nail polish on all the time …
But let me be clear – I LOVE the attitude you girls bring, I’m just in a different place.
Theresa – I’ll raise you one – underwater photography and I used to develop my own slides! Add sorting your buoyancy and nitrogen levels in a surge or current while figuring out the light. And I never ever quite got my piscatorial models to follow instructions …
Jocelyn – agree re the first outing. I’m a perfectionist (with some things, not everything now, meaning I’ve got better at that …) but that is one I’ll want perfect. That’s just me and my desire.
Cali – I have gone from clean skin. The first makeover was at the MUA’s studio. And I left there dressed, in heels, walked down dozens of steps and a sloping road to the car before N drove us home, but also including a shopping stop she had to make, where I sat in a car outside the shops, in view, with lots of people walking past. So you could argue I’ve done the start to finish makeup and also had a first public outing. However the former was working on various elements, although with a completed look, and the latter while exciting wasn’t a full-blown outing so I’m not counting it!
I really do enjoy the discussions on our similarities and differences. Makes me a better person …
Thanks for the shout out!
I am headed to Melbourne on Sun-Dee for a bonus 10 weeks of summer, leaving freezing temperatures and 7 inches of snow behind. Right now I need to decide which small fraction of my Dee wardrobe is going to make the trip with me.
I have a bikini that I bought on line (White House Black
Market made me an offer I couldn’t refuse) and I’m waiting for it to arrive so I can add it to the travel pile. Melbourne is not known for its beaches, but I am hoping to give it a test drive. I also have 10 weeks of exercise and calorie counting on tap so I can look somewhat decent in my new acquisition.
I can only suggest the next time you venture Melbourne way that you drag along Maddie stuff and get out the door. I have found your countrymen/women to be accepting, or more accurately, they don’t care. Plus, I suspect based on some of your prior posts that you are a continent (and a lot of sand and scrub) away from anyone who knows you or your spousal unit, that no one you know will be spotting you. If nothing else, I know the Dangerfield stores will be extremely welcoming. And to echo the others, no one will care if you shave your extremities. Make it a wedding present to yourself!
Aussie Aussie Aussie Oi Oi Oi!